Posts By Connie Morgan

0 Trade School > College

January 5, 2019
by Connie Morgan
· In the News · Thought Box

There’s a lie that’s being fed to every young person in America. It’s a lie that’s not good for the individual kid and it’s not good for society. The lie is that we all should go to college and get a degree. This is entirely false, not only should we not all go to college, but we should encourage trade school more than we encourage university. This coming from someone who went to college, had a blast, and doesn’t regret it.

I entered university without a set plan or major. I was open minded and figured I’d use the prerequisite classes to figure out what I should study. I enjoyed a lot of my classes but it was Econ 201 that changed my life. The very first day, Professor Hedrick asked the class what the biggest cost of going to college was. People shouted out, “Tuition!” “Groceries!” and “Girlfriends!” After chuckling, Professor Hedrick shook his head and said, “Those are all wrong answers, the greatest cost of going to college is the opportunity cost.” In other words, the most financially damaging part of college is the money one isn’t making while attending. I knew then that I wanted to learn more about economics, particularly opportunity costs. To this day, I make all major decisions by considering the opportunity cost first. Unfortunately, most people go their entire lives without understanding opportunity costs; certainly most 18-year-olds don’t.

We’re sold this idea in high school that you make more money when you go to college. We’re shown a chart (like the one to the right) illistrating what a high school grad vs college grad make over their life. Those charts aren’t wrong: a college grad will make more money than a high school grad. What those charts don’t show is net worth throughout your lifetime.

There is a shortage of trade workers in America. “Blue Collar” jobs that pay well sit vacant while high school graduates rush to get an art degree. There are roughly 30 million jobs in the United States that pay $55,000 or more a year and don’t require a bachelor’s degree. These jobs include construction, plumbing, lineman, or my personal favorite, farriers (horse shoers) who make on average a whopping $92,000 a year. More than the average college graduate’s peak salary of $84,500. A $55,000 yearly salary may not seem much, but considering the avoidance of debt and money made during the average 5 years and 1 month it takes someone to earn a bachelor’s degree, it’s significant. *For examples in this blog average electrician will be used as comparison to the average college graduate because the average electrician salary is around $55,000.

For those who aren’t mathematically inclined let me put it this way; the average electrician has the opportunity to have about $30,000* in retirement in the same time the college grad has no money in retirement and will owe roughly $120,000* in total for their degree. Quite the difference. Because of the ever-increasing cost of college, it is estimated that students graduating in 2015 or later will have to push retirement back to 75. Not the case for the average electrician.

Given current average rates of return (6%) and average student loans, the most significant difference between a college grad and tradesman is not money made but rather money saved. An electrician and and college grad will net $1,000,000 in combined lifetime earnings and retirement savings at essentially the same time – 50* years old for the electrician, 49* for the average grad. Where this gets deceiving is that at that same age, (50) the average electrician will have roughly $375,0000* more in retirement savings than the average grad. The electrician has been saving for 32 years now, at a 15% recommended rate of savings they’d have almost $600,000* saved by age 50. By age 58* they’d have $1 million in retirement savings and $1.5 million by 64*.

The college grad starts saving later and is hindered by loans. On average, graduates with debt are putting 5% of their paycheck or less into retirement, nowhere near the 15% – 20% recommended. Because college students are now taking 20 years on average to payoff debt, recent graduates can expect to have the minimum $1 million for retirement at age 70*. Around age 76 is when $1.5 million in retirement would accrue.

According to data from Sallie Mae, 42% of student debt belongs to parents. For simplicity’s sake, calculations in this analysis were done with students assuming all debt responsibility. Ultimately, the total time spent and cost of interest on debt in this analysis is accurate, it’s just frequently split between parents and student instead of all on the student. More on parent college contributions later. For a full breakdown of how lifetime earnings and savings accrual were calculated click here.

In lifetime earnings, yes, a college graduates get bigger checks than the average electrician. That picture is the one painted in our mind. The first chart is all they show us, what they don’t show us is the good pay combined with retirement potential that a trade-skill can provide.

The data on college debt can be pretty confusing and misleading. Reports will tell you graduates average $30,100 in student loans. While this is a large increase from years past, it still doesn’t seem that bad, but I couldn’t figure out where they were getting this number. School is now costing on average $16,575.75 a year but is increasing at a rate of 2% per year. So the average five years and 1 month of schooling should cost around $120,000* after accounting for the average 28% covered by scholarships/grants according to Fannie Mae, $167,000* before scholarships/grants. An average of $30,100 in debt would mean 54% of college costs are being covered by something other than student loans and scholarships/grants, which didn’t seem right to me. Then I realized the flaw in the $30,100 figure. It does not account for debt held by parents or non-student loans. It also doesn’t account for cash paid from family or personal savings which, albeit isn’t debt, but certainly worth considering.

As I put the pieces together, it started to make sense. Out of the $167,000* it costs to get a degree, 28% is covered by scholarships/grants, 25% is covered by the student (most likely a combination of loans and a part-time job) and 47% is covered by parents (most likely a combination of loans and savings). Of course the $120,000* cost of school after scholarships/grants isn’t the actual cost, after interest the total amount paid in one way or another for a bachelor’s degree is closer to an optimistic estimate of $160,000*.

The cost to parents who want to help pay for school is not talked about enough. Even a parent who saves early often delay their retirement by ten years. The average student-debt (for their child) held by couples over 60 is $23,500. About 55% of parents have more than $40,000 in student debt and parents average $9,000 in cash out of their own savings to help pay for college. It is not uncommon for college-contributing parents to work into their 70s or retire with half of what their current lifestyle costs. Whether planned or not, parents’ contribution to their child’s education means sacrifice. Funny enough, although not conclusive, there is evidence that children whose parents foot the bill perform worse in school. Even if the debt or cost isn’t technically “yours,” passing that along to your parents isn’t something that most 18-year-olds consider or even grasp.

Speaking of what 18-year-olds can grasp… Why do we encourage young people to decide what they’re going to do for the rest of their life five years before their brains are done developing? A third of students change their major at least once in three years which explains why folks are taking over five years to earn a degree. Not only do many people go back to college to get second bachelor’s degree, but 8% of community college students have already earned a bachelor’s degree. Only 27% of college graduates work in their field of study. Perhaps “older and wiser” people pushing college onto high schoolers is one of the biggest scams known to man? High Schools push college because that is how their success is measured, colleges recruit even those likely to drop because one year of tuition is better than none, and universities push financial aid packages to students who don’t understand them. Universities are embroiled in financial aid scandal regularly. Students graduate college with confusing loans and usually without a job in their field BUT the high school tallied them as a win and the universities will get their money one way or another.

Why is college pushed on high schoolers? That’s what high school faculty know! All your teachers went to college; very few if any went to trade school. Those who haven’t gotten a college degree (teachers’ aides and such) often blame their lower income status on not going to college; very few will say “wish I went to lineman school.” Furthermore, the consensus seems to be that college prep is what high school teachers should focus on. High School teachers are rewarded for and chided for not prepping kids for college.

Recruiters from universities visited my high school but I didn’t hear from a chef or plumber or elevator repairman. Country-wide, 66% of high schoolers immediately enroll in college upon graduation. This number differs wildly from community to community. In my podunk town well under a third of my class immediately went to university – yet high schools everywhere are increasingly tailoring their curriculums to be mini colleges. Furthermore, out of that 66% that do attend college nationwide, 60% of those will end up dropping out. Out of the 40% left, 27% will get a job in their field of study. In short, a measly 7% of high schoolers go to college right away, complete college and get jobs related to their major.

Instead of prepping the majority of students who won’t attend or finish college, High Schools largely focus on college prep. I suppose it’s assumed kids going into the trades will figure it out but the future college students need every resource available. If the focus on college prep over trade prep feels backwards, it’s because it is. You have two years to adjust to college before you pick a major, with countless resources on most university campuses. But we expect the 74%+ who don’t graduate college to immediately adjust to entering the workforce at 18 or 20? Most high schoolers don’t know how to balance a checkbook but damn it they know how to take a standardized test!

Trade school will run you about $35,000 with programs as affordable as $5,000. Additionally, with many trades, apprenticeship is an option eliminating the need for trade school at all. There are also scholarships for trades, shoutout Mike Rowe. When it comes to lifetime net, an electrician has the opportunity to make out significantly better than the average college graduate.

Another point worth making, the initial $50,000 salary right out of college is average. The $120,000* is the average cost of college. That peak salary of $84,500 is average. This means half of all college graduates – 950,000 people each year, make less than $50,000, spend more than $120,000 on college and peak at less than $84,500, maybe not in combination, but still. Are you willing to bet $120,000 that you’re above average?

In review, there are seven things they don’t tell you in high school about college:

The huge opportunity cost.
The difference between net and gross pay.
Which high-paying careers don’t require college.
What school will actually cost you – beyond the initial cost.
What your parents are sacrificing when they help you pay for college.
Dropout rates.
The reality behind all those averages.

*See spreadsheet here.

0 Trump Is Not Black America’s Problem

December 15, 2018
by Connie Morgan
· Culture · Thought Box

Those who know me know I do not like Kanye West. Like realllly don’t like him. I have spent more energy than I should have professing why I think it’s stupid he has had so much success. I have almost broken up with someone over Kanye. I wish I was joking. So you can imagine what a pickle I was in when perhaps the famous person I hated the most started saying things I agreed with. Not so much the loving Trump stuff, but the free thinking stuff. Kanye didn’t drop any knowledge on me, nothing he said was anything I hadn’t heard before. But for many black people it probably was the first time they heard a person of color tell them they don’t have to be in lockstep with people just because they may look like them. But even more importantly, Kanye’s love of Trump helped illustrate 1) how narrow-minded the left is and 2) that the left doesn’t actually care about black people or really any minority they claim to protect for that matter. This post will focus on the latter point.

I was told by multiple persons that if Trump was elected all my rights as a minority woman would be taken away, including my right to vote. Two years later, the claim hasn’t aged well to say the least. To put it bluntly, black people are thriving under Trump. The black unemployment rate has hit an all-time low under Trump. Of course, the left can’t admit that fact to be a good thing. Now it’s “Well, the black unemployment rate is still higher than the white unemployment rate!” or “The black unemployment rate was declining under Obama anyway and has been for years!” or even “Black unemployment can be low and Trump can still be a racist!” All of these statements are true but allow the left to ignore a couple things; at the very least, Trump isn’t impeding on black success like they claimed he would. Furthermore, if Trump is racist, it’s not outwardly effecting his policy making. The left struggles to wrap their head around the idea that two things can be true at once. Blacks can be thriving under Trump and this progress has been in the works for a long time.

Even if the black unemployment rate was on a rapid decline that just happened to fall in Trump’s lap, that doesn’t explain the sharp increase in black entrepreneurship under Trump. It certainly doesn’t explain Trump’s aggressive pursuit of prison reform and his pardons/commutations of multiple black citizens. Pretty strange behavior for a supposed racist. If the man is racist, at this point I don’t care because his attempts to “cover for his racism” is resulting in good policy for minorities.

The real issue is that Trump’s approval ratings amongst blacks, though volatile, has approached 20%. If Republicans manage to hold an approval rating at or around 20% during and after Trump’s term as president, that would be enough to seriously affect Democrats chance at winning another presidential election. Democrats cannot afford to lose even a small percentage of the black vote which means even a nod at Donald Trump is not worth the risk for left leaning commentators.

The funny thing is, despite great jobs numbers and prison reform there is a problem in the black community that persists and is often ignored, the family. Government cannot save us on this one. The black population will never match whites in prosperity and success until we figure out how to keep the black fathers at home. So maybe we should stop worrying about whether a president who hasn’t impeded on our freedoms is racist and focus on getting the black family back together.

0 Crybaby Conservatives

November 23, 2018
by Connie Morgan
· In the News

When it comes to overreacting, the left wins. I just wrote a piece about ridiculous claims of racism but other examples of unnecessary outrage include shutting down highways when a democratic election doesn’t turn out as desired or clutching their pearls because someone says boobs in a news segment. I thought of Democrats as the whiney party that gets hysterical for no reason but recently I have been rethinking this. Conservatives have done a lot of freaking out lately causing many an eye-roll from me.

First there was Conservatives getting mad that Robert “Beto” O’Rourke goes by Beto (frequently dropping the O’Rourke) despite not having any latino heritage, seemingly in order to relate more to the latino voter. Do I think going by Beto is a political move? Yes. Do I think conservatives are hypocrites for getting upset? Yes, considering his opponent is Rafael “Ted” Cruz who just might go by Ted to appear more “American.” Are they both kind of silly for not going by their given names? Yes. Is either really a big deal? No.

Then there was Hillary’s “offensive” joke about black people. In an interview where the interviewer confused Eric Holder with Cory Booker, Hillary corrected her and then said “all blacks look alike,” in what was very clearly a joke. It wasn’t even her joke. It’s a joke that’s been said many times and to be honest, still makes me laugh every time. Instead of interpreting as a refreshingly human moment for HIllary, the right suddenly seemed to be pro-PC culture. This joke wasn’t even rated PG-13, it’s been said, it was off the cuff, it wasn’t a big deal. The right side of the aisle looks hypocritical when it gets upset about such things.

Shortly after the 2018 election Nancy Pelosi made a gaffe when she said “Let’s hear it for preexisting medical conditions!” She obviously meant to say protecting or covering preexisting conditions when you listen to the statement in context. But of course, folks on the right acted like this was the mistake of the year.

But of course we can’t forget the Jim Acosta incident. Acosta refused to sit down and pass along the microphone after Trump told him his turn was over. A White House aide who happened to be female then came to grab the microphone and Acosta still didn’t give up the mic, lightly brushing her arm as he pulled away from her. I heard right wing commentators call this “man handling” and other terms putting this incident wildly out of context. Acosta was wrong but not because of the way he interacted with the aide, but because of the way he always grandstands at press conferences. The right made a grave mistake in making the incident about his interaction with the aide instead of focusing on how he regularly breaks protocol at these conferences. You ask your question, the president answers, then you sit down and pass the mic. The right looked ridiculous in it’s attempt to malign Acosta as some sort of abuser, missing an opportunity to set the standard for future conferences.

Lately the right has seemed more sensitive than usual. The left lost in 2016 because of their embrace of PC culture. The right seems to be falling into the trap of hysteria for clicks. Let’s call balls and strikes as we see them instead of treating any small blunder like armageddon. Something can be stupid but not offensive, unfunny but not wrong, a mistake but not a sign of doltishness. Conservatives look like hypocrites when they cry over spilled milk.

0 The Left Who Cried Wolf

November 9, 2018
by Connie Morgan
· In the News

Ever heard the story of the boy who cried wolf? Boy tells the town a wolf is coming, everybody freaks, turns out it was a prank. Boy tells the town a wolf is coming, nobody listens to him, this time he wasn’t lying and the wolf eats all the sheep because no one reacted? This is what the left does when it comes to “crying racism.”

Pumpkins are not racist, neither is math, yet you’ll find papers, articles, and/or blogs declaring both to be racist. Those are the more outlandish examples of crying racism but I’ll go as far to say, test scores aren’t racist, voter registration laws aren’t racist, and neither is touching a black woman’s hair – rude and annoying, yes, but not racist. There is racism in America and there are race-based issues we need to address. Either the left is vastly mistaken, or they’re right and racism really isn’t a big deal since everyone is racist yet things are going pretty well in America. The left makes it difficult for us to address race issues when they actively promote the idea that everything and everyone is racist. Immediately upon certain darlings of the left losing in the recent midterm election, racism was being shouted amongst those on the political left. Even I have become less and less sensitive to racist cries over the years due to the number of outlandish claims made by the left. When I hear someone else’s claims of racism I find myself extra skeptical because I read about race claims weekly that turn out to be nothing. Think I’m being too harsh? Let me share some fun examples.

Celebrate Halloween with a pumpkin this year? Well then I guess you are an insensitive prick! According to two researchers, pumpkins are symbolic of whiteness. If a company uses pumpkins in its marketing come Fall, you might as well take that as a wink and a nod at the rich racist whites. Us blacks inherently know stuff marketed with pumpkins aren’t for the coloreds.

…class, gender, place, and especially race are employed in popular media and marketing of food and flavor; it suggests complicated interplay among food, leisure, labor, nostalgia, and race. Pumpkins in popular culture also reveal contemporary racial and class coding of rural versus urban places.

If you like to frequent the farmers’ market, you are cultivating racism, my friend. This, according to an article published in The Washington Times. Confused? So was I given that I love farmers’ markets because I get joy out of supporting local vendors, especially minorities, who farm in ethical ways. According to professors at San Diego State University, I am just part of the issue of gentrification and normalizing “white consumption habits.” Damn it! My love of fresh corn is me succumbing to white norms! Fresh, chemical-free food is a white people thing – everyone knows this. According to the left, white people can’t enjoy what white people like even if it doesn’t hurt or affect minorities in any way because they’re white and therefore inherently racist.

Another example is hiking. The Sierra Club published an article on “The Unbearable Whiteness of Hiking and How to Solve It.” As far as I know, there aren’t any national parks banning non-whites from hiking, REI doesn’t sell exclusively to whites, and the North Face doesn’t post “whites only” signs on their front doors. Perhaps cultural differences a white eagerness to be in the outdoors? Linking a lack of outdoor recreation to the obesity rates amongst black Americans may be valid, but there is nothing preventing blacks from going outside and recreating. Blaming the group that does recreate is not helpful in solving this problem, but sure, let’s blame those damn whites and their love of exercise.

I take punctuality seriously, but to expect others to do the same would be culturally insensitive of me according to Clemson University. This is where the argument that “all cultures are equal” completely falls apart. If your culture celebrates lateness, not only does your culture get that wrong, it doesn’t matter. Employers are allowed to set the standard and when you agree to be their employee, you agree to adhere to those standards even if they conflict with your culture. See, that’s the beautiful thing about a free market labor system: you don’t have to trade your work for a wage if you don’t agree with the parameters set for said work.

To list a few more examples, you can find papers/articles/studies on how veganism is too white, cosplay (not blackface) is racist, loving your country is only for white people, Dungeons and Dragons perpetuates white male privilege, facial hair is problematic, and, my personal favorite, math is racist. I kid you not, a professor from the University of Illinois explained that because so many mathematicians are white, math itself belongs to whiteness.

…curricula emphasizing terms like Pythagorean theorem and pi perpetuate a perception that mathematics was largely developed by Greeks and other Europeans.

I don’t think I need to explain why outrage over math theories named after the men who developed them is insane.

These are just a few examples a Google search spit out. The left has become so crazy-actually I’ll say lazy in their attempt to malign those at the bottom of the intersectional hierarchy that 1) they are less trustworthy as a whole and 2) they make it harder to fight actual racism. So many of the supposed race issues aren’t related to race so much as cultural differences amongst groups that self-segregate. White people gravitating towards an activity isn’t problematic, but placing blame to avoid responsibility for your group’s lack of interest in said activity is.

2 What is Beyonce the Queen of?

July 23, 2018
by Connie Morgan
· Culture · Thought Box

One of the most recognizable and influential pop stars in the world right now is Beyonce. She started out as the front woman of Destiny’s Child, broke free as a solo act in 2003 with her debut album Dangerously in Love, and hasn’t looked back since. She has released six solo studio albums and very recently dropped her first collab album with husband Jay-Z, titled Everything is Love. A fashion clothing line, a perfume line, movie roles, an athletic wear line, and a handful of endorsements later, Beyonce is now worth a cool $350 million. The most valuable asset Beyonce has been able to cultivate is the “Beyhive.” Her loyal (though not as loyal as one might think for reasons later discussed) fanbase praises everything she does, sometimes going so far as to actually worship her and/or send death threats to people who dare critique her.

Notice how I said that Beyonce is the most recognizable, not the most successful or most popular. I say this because by many standards she is not the most popular. She isn’t even the most popular female artist right now…hell, she isn’t even the most popular black female artist right now. Taylor Swift, Adele (with only three albums compared to Beyonce’s six), and Rihanna have all sold tens of millions more albums than Beyonce. The Beyhive is loyal, but not loyal enough to go out and buy the record I guess. In fact, Beyonce’s best selling album is…her first one, Dangerously in Love, her second best selling album is her second album, B’day, with I Am…Sasha Fierce close behind. Her fourth album, 4 performed abysmally and is easily her worst selling album to date. Her self-titled album trails her first three in sales and Lemonade has sold half the amount of that one. You wouldn’t know it based on the hype, but Beyonce’s music is actually getting less popular as far as album sales go.

Even at her peak, Beyonce has never had a best selling album of the year. And she’s only been the best selling female once in 2014 when she came in second behind the Frozen soundtrack…so in a way she still wasn’t the best selling female artist. She’s rarely ever the best selling artist in her genre of female R&B/Pop having been beaten out by Rihanna, Christina Aguilera, Fergie, Mary J Blige, and more throughout the years. Her fame is actually very strange when you look at the sales of her main product – music. After her Coachella performance some people had the audacity to call her the greatest pop star of all time – yes, even ahead of Michael Jackson. Beyonce doesn’t even have an album in the fifty highest selling of all time! And it might surprise you to learn who does grace that list…Kenny G, Jewel, Boyz II Men, and Hootie and the Blowfish. Maybe not so surprisingly the list also includes Prince, Whitney Houston (twice), Bob Marley, Adele, Fleetwood Mac, and of course Michael Jackson at number one. Plenty of female representation, plenty of black representation, plenty of R&B/Pop representation…and no Beyonce.

As far as touring stats go, Beyonce is no slouch and pulls in big numbers. Alas, she still does not make the list of Top 20 grossing tours of all time (Celine Dion and Madonna x2 make the list). Her most successful “Formation” World Tour ranks 15th in top grossing tours of the 2010s.

I’ve established that the talk doesn’t match the walk when it comes to Beyonce fandom but granted album sales aren’t everything. Queen doesn’t have any of the Top 50 selling albums of all time and I argue Freddie Mercury is one of the most talented people to walk this earth on a regular basis. So what about Beyonce’s talent? Well she is stunningly beautiful, but that’s not really talent, more so good genes. She doesn’t play an instrument but she has a nice voice. She has a really good voice…but is she Whitney? Hell no. Is she ‘90s era Mariah? Absolutely not. And even right now we all know who the best pop singer is…I hate to bring her up again…but that’s Adele. Honestly, I’ve never heard someone make the “Beyonce has the greatest voice ever” argument so I won’t spend much time refuting it.

Then there’s real talent, learned and honed-in talent: music composing, lyric writing, choreography…things you can have a knack for but take lots of work to hone in. Beyonce’s not known for her producing and “beat making” ability like Kanye or Pharrell. She doesn’t play an instrument like Alicia Keys. She is frequently listed as a co-writer on her songs but when one of the songs she “co-wrote” was nominated for an Oscar but only three people could be listed as co-writers, her name was removed…But really, does she want to take credit for stuff like the garbage listed below. Lyrics for “ApeShit,” her single with Jay-Z that she co-wrote and co-produced:

[Chorus: Beyoncé & Quavo]
Stack my money fast and go (fast, fast, go)
Fast like a Lambo (skrrt, skrrt, skrrt)
I be jumpin’ off the stage, ho (jumpin’, jumpin’, hey, hey)
Crowd better save her (crowd goin’ ape, hey)
I can’t believe we made it (this is what we made, made)
This is what we’re thankful (this is what we thank, thank)
I can’t believe we made it (this a different angle)
Have you ever seen the crowd goin’ apeshit? Rah!

[Verse 1: Beyoncé & Quavo]
Gimme my check, put some respek on my check
Or pay me in equity (pay me in equity)
Watch me reverse out of debt (skrrt)
He got a bad bitch, bad bitch
We livin’ lavish, lavish
I got expensive fabrics
I got expensive habits
He wanna go with me (go with me)
He like to roll the weed (roll the weed)
He wanna be with me (be with me)
He wanna give me that vitamin D (D!)
Ice ornaments, icy style tournaments (woo)
You ain’t on to this (no)
Don’t think they on to this (no)

These are obviously horrible lyrics by an honest person’s standard. If you’re not sure, try saying them out loud. Good lyrics read like a poem even without music…these read like a teenager’s first attempt at rapping. At this point though, Beyonce doesn’t even have to try to write good music; anything she releases is praised as some sort of revelation.

Another thing Beyonce is known for is her dancing. I am not professionally trained but I do enjoy watching dance and can tell when something requires skill to execute. Beyonce’s dancing for the most part, does not. There is little footwork and it’s mostly bending over, shaking her ass, and whipping her hair around. Ciara is more athletic when it comes to dance and Janet Jackson has much, much, much, better choreography that she actually does herself unliked Beyonce who has a team of choreographers. One could argue Madonna had more revolutionary choreography than Beyonce. Are you rage typing “Single Ladies” into YouTube right now? It’s a fun dance, I’ll give you that, but not difficult, not choreographed by Beyonce, and not original!

But it’s her brand you say! Beyonce has the power to sell and influence beyond music. Well she dabbled in movies, and while Dreamgirls was a hit, let’s be honest, Jennifer Hudson is the reason why. Following Dreamgirls, Cadillac Records and Obsessed were both panned by the critics. Her women’s athletic wear brand, Ivy Park, which is literally normal-looking sweatshirts, t-shirts, leggings, and bras that say “Ivy Park”- such design genius – sold out upon its original release in 2016, but since then you haven’t heard much about the brand. Athletica and Lululemon continue to dominate the space with Adidas becoming a larger player. Kate Hudson’s Fabletics and Prana are doing very well too. On the other hand, I struggle to find any information on how Ivy Park sales are going right now.

“Well Beyonce empowers young women, especially black women so I don’t care about all that other stuff.” Does she though? Empowers means give someone the authority to do something which granted, Beyonce can’t really do, or make someone stronger and more confident which is the “Beyonce empowers” I assume people are referring to. I want to ask how exactly Beyonce empowers women? How many girls lacking self-confidence watch Beyonce sing “Formation” on stage and think, “Wow, now I have the confidence to open that restaurant I’ve been too afraid to pursue”? How many young girls look at Beyonce and Jay-Z’s relationship and go “that’s the true definition of a loving and devoted marriage; that’s what I’ll model mine after.” Or in reality, how many girls follow one of the most beautiful women on the planet, on instagram with her lavish lifestyle, constantly changing hair styles, and outrageous designer clothes and pursue shallow beauty standards because of it?

Beyonce’s lyrics aren’t empowering. The vast majority of her music is about sexing up a boyfriend. I’m sorry but repeating “Who runs the world, girls” over and over again does not make anyone a stronger woman. If Beyonce really wanted to help young black people, she’d sing about graduating from high school, acquiring and keeping a job and getting faithfully married before having babies. If Beyonce wanted to help black people build better relationships she’d sing about finding a partner who shares your values, is conservative with their money, and treats you with respect. Instead relationships in her songs are all about having sex and spending lots of money. Don’t get me wrong, the former is certainly important in a relationship but a good marriage is about more than physical attraction. Being a “bad bitch” is not the key to a fulfilling, healthy relationship.

The “I’ma strong woman and so are you” bit has proved ineffective in shifting black culture to more prosperous ways of living. Despite Beyonce’s huge audience and influential power she doesn’t talk to black people about improving the culture or really anything. She’s somewhat notorious for not giving opinions. She just collects your money and goes back to her mansion(s).

Beyonce has made some catchy tunes, especially earlier in her career. “Love on Top” and “Sweet Dreams” are great pop songs. (Love on Top is probably my favorite music video of hers too.) Are they a display of incredible talent and skill? No. But they’re what pop music should be. What Beyonce is not is a visionary talent revolutionizing art. What Beyonce is not is a positive black influencer. What Beyonce is not, is a god. She’s a pop star, and she should be treated as such.

0 What Even is Fair Trade?

June 25, 2018
by Connie Morgan
· Culture · Health and Fitness · Thought Box · Wellness

Fair trade is awesome. No, not the kind Trump talks about where trade deficits are bad and trade wars are awesome. What I and other hipsters who use the term fair trade mean is a product produced in a way deemed ethical and…well, fair. There are various fair trade certificates and organizations all differing slightly on what their standard of “fair” is. This is why using those stamps of approval are useful but it’s also worth thinking about your own ethical standard. What I define as fair might be a little different than you but for the most part fair trade for everyone refers to fair wages for those involved in the making of said product, fair working conditions, sustainable practices (does the product create a lot of waste and/or have an unjustified effect on the environment) and were animals abused in the making of the product. Seems pretty simple but there are many companies that don’t meet this standard, only meet it halfway, or don’t have the same definition of fair that I do. Below is how I personally, define each of these standards.

The makers of the product are paid a fair wage.
The makers of the product are paid according to the value they add to the company. This will vary country to country and it doesn’t necessarily mean they must be paid more than minimum wage. I don’t think minimum wage for a fast food cook is unfair but I do think minimum wage for a fast food manager is unfair. Perhaps you disagree with this standard but that’s the cool thing about a free market, you can buy according to your values and I to mine. Any product that’s made in America meets this standard for me. I believe America is a free enough place that employees are generally paid what they are worth and have the option to find better work if they believe they are treated unfairly. There are resources to learn more about fair wages around the world and you can find them here.

The makers of the product work in decent conditions.
What I mean by this is that no one is forced to work extreme hours at threat of losing their job if they refuse. Workers are also in air conditioned facilities or heated facilities if necessary. And this should go without saying but workers are not physically punished for messing up something on the job.
I also avoid products with chemicals in them in order to meet this standard. Even in the U.S. employees work with chemicals without even realizing the damage they are causing to themselves until years later. I also avoid meat products, especially from factory farms because of the negative effects breathing in all the fumes and dealing with animal waste can have. Check out this link for more info on the negative effects of factory farms on employees. Any product involving chemicals often have adverse effects on workers. Perhaps the best example of this is pesticides and farm workers. You can read more on that here. Chemical free and BPA free are things I look out for when buying stuff.

Sustainable practices.
This one was a huge reason why I gave up meat. As more and more people around the world adopt the American diet or westernized diet rather, we will need more and more land to raise the animals. There simply isn’t enough land on Earth to feed 7 billion people a animal centered diet. There also isn’t a good way to get rid of all the waste these animals create. You can read more about the sustainability of an animal based diet here.
When it comes to non-food products I am really not too picky. They don’t have to be green certified but I don’t want them dumping waste in rivers. In fact, a lot of companies will forgo the vegan/green/fair trade stamps because those usually cost money to apply for and they don’t want to transfer the cost to their customers which I totally get and appreciate. So don’t disregard a product simply because it doesn’t have the stamp you are accustomed to seeing.
It’s also a plus when the materials used to make the product are biodegradable, reusable etc. I try to avoid plastic when I can

Cruelty free.
Companies will always brag about this so it’s usually not hard to figure out. I am not against using rats in lab tests per say but animal testing can get out of control pretty quick. PETA gets a lot of shit, most of which they deserve, but when it comes to animal testing they make a strong case.
*With all these guidelines you have to be careful. Often companies will claim to be fair trade or green or cruelty free etc. because those who put the product together meet all these guidelines. Sometimes the people sewing the shoes together are treated well but the people who cultivate the shoe materials aren’t. Just something to keep in mind.

I started focusing on more ethical shopping funny enough, because of my capitalistic values. The trade part of fair trade actually drew me in just as much as the fair part. I realized I alone was responsible for the consequences of my actions and that through a free market system I could tell companies what was and wasn’t acceptable with every dollar I spent. Your value system might not be the same as mine, but I still encourage you to shop along your moral compass. People often tell me they feel helpless when they shouldn’t. The organic product market is expected to grow 14% from 2017 to 2021, from 2004 to 2016 Fairtrade International product revenue grew roughly 835%, sales of plant based food went up 8.1% last year and continues to grow, the natural (chemical free) beauty industry is seeing sales increase every year with growth at 7% outpacing overall industry growth and Jessica Alba famously became a billionaire almost overnight after starting The Honest Company.
This growth isn’t because companies just felt like it, it’s because their customers demanded it. A lot of my fellow naturalists claim to hate capitalism, but it’s the fuel creating massive change across all industries. You say something every time you buy something and businesses are listening. Compassionate capitalism isn’t a real economic term, but if it were, I suppose it would look like shopping fair trade.

1 Appropriation is Awesome

May 17, 2018
by Connie Morgan
· Culture · Thought Box

People have been taking “cultural appropriation” way too far. By people, I mean the American left which has lead the mission to yell at, bully, and belittle anyone who participates in anything that wasn’t created by their ethnic group. White people aren’t allowed to make burritos, only black people should rap and in a recent example of cultural appropriation idiocy, a high school girl was shamed on Twitter for wearing a Chinese dress (and wearing it well I might add) to her prom. Thank goodness I am half-white and half-black and therefore allowed to dip into two different cultures.

So what exactly is cultural appropriation? It’s often described as someone adopting from a culture that is not his or her own – a hairstyle, a piece of clothing, a manner of speaking, even a type of exercise (yoga, for example). Everyday feminism takes this a step further explaining that cultural appropriation takes place when a dominant group borrows from a culture they have oppressed. It doesn’t matter if you specifically have never oppressed said group, just that someone of your same ethnicity has. Neither of these definitions seem inherently evil to me but whichever definition you use, cultural appropriation is confusing from the start.

First, let’s look at the broader definition of cultural appropriation. Take something from someone else’s culture and you’re appropriating. This means if your culture didn’t invent a style of dance, you should not participate. Well, white people invented tap dancing. If you’re familiar with the history of tap dance you might say nuh-uh, tap dancing was invented by blacks in the south. I’d say you’re right but tap was actually an appropriation of Irish clogging. Poor Irish and poor blacks lived amongst each other in the south. Both groups were discriminated against and faced socio-economic struggles. (Thomas Sowell’s Black Rednecks and White Liberals explains this in more detail.) The two groups ended up borrowing quite a bit from each other. It’s just fact that blacks appropriated the Irish clog to create tap and I’m glad they did…But that’s appropriation so I guess only the Irish should be allowed to tap. If blacks can’t participate in tap dance, we never would have had Savion Glover, quite possibly the best tap dancer who ever lived. Please take a minute to watch him here; he truly is astounding. Ballet certainly isn’t a part of African culture, so say goodbye to Misty Copeland too. If Hip-Hop is a black-American invention then someone better call Channing Tatum and tell him to stop dancing. Classical music isn’t rooted in Asian culture so forget about Yo-Yo Ma. Opera began in Italy so if you ain’t Italian don’t even bother. Flutes originated in China so literally every kid in my high school band’s flute section was way out of line.

The arts are an easy one to pick on but you can apply this to nearly any piece of the human experience. There would be great losses in our cultural advancement if people weren’t allowed to cross cultural lines. Weren’t we all told as kids that copying is the greatest form of flattery? If someone uses something from your culture to create something new, they most certainly respect your culture. If they didn’t, why would they use it? Now if a white person makes a dream catcher and says “hey, I invented this” I could see the issue but that is rarely, if ever the case in these instances of “cultural appropriation.”

But SJWs think they got ya on the second definition of cultural appropriation, the one that says only oppressors can appropriate meaning white people can’t participate in any culture that isn’t their own, but black people, who are the most oppressed, can borrow from any culture they want. (Actually Jews are the most oppressed, but that’s a topic for another day.) The problem with this idea is that it really only hurts minorities. Ok, so now white people can only wear jeans and eat italian food..not really a big deal. But that authentic taco stand? You just lost all your white customers. Black rappers? You just lost 70-75% of your audience. The UFC would not only see a huge drop in ratings; (can’t have white people viewing mixed martial arts) they would lose quite a few athletes as well, with Dana White following them out the door. His name is literally White! How much more offensive can you be??!!!

I realized that cultural appropriation had gone way too far when some of my friends admired a dress I have. It is a beautiful, colorful, handmade dress. I bought it from an online shop that sells dresses made by African artisans. My friends ranted and raved about the dress so much that I asked one of them why she didn’t just buy one for herself. She told me she was afraid if she did people would get mad because she is white. And you know what, she’s probably not wrong; someone might get mad. But the person who gets mad that a white woman supported a black designer is an absolute fool.

Why would you want to prevent 77% of the American population from purchasing goods made by minorities? Do you want minority culture in the U.S. to disappear, because without the white man’s dollar most culture-based businesses will fail. Do you not want white people helping uplift merchants in third world countries out of poverty by supporting their craft? It breaks my heart thinking about the dollars those African dress makers are missing out on because white women have been bullied into fear of celebrating the beauty of something not their own.

So appropriate, I say! Without it, we wouldn’t have tap dance or blues or MMA or ice cream cones or me! If you’re worried about it still, just follow these rules:

Give credit where credit is due.
Don’t claim you created something you didn’t.
Don’t wildly misrepresent a culture.
Don’t claim you’re giving props to Native-Americans when you’re in a skimpy outfit with feathers and just want to dress provocatively.

That’s pretty much it. Be respectful but be a sponge. If Drake isn’t proof we need more cross-cultural appropriation, I don’t know what is.

0 All-Natural Homemade Body Scrub

April 24, 2018
by Connie Morgan
· Health and Fitness · Wellness

While I never had great skin, I also never had horrible skin..until I was around 23 and my skin got bad. I have searched for pictures of me during that time but I really didn’t take any unless I was wearing a full face of makeup. I have no idea what caused the sudden breakouts, there wasn’t a diet change, stressful time, getting on or off birth control or any of the other go-to explanations.

The acne was also in a weird spot, all over my cheeks. Before 23, on the occasion I did get acne it was usually in my “t-zone,” through the center of my face and across the forehead. The whole all over my cheeks thing was new. It was very puzzling. I tried different remedies from your average drugstore cleansers to prescribed medicine. None of it was super effective and then my friend told me about salt and sugar scrubs.

Apparently store bought exfoliants cause tiny cuts in your skin which then get infected. These little red infections have you thinking you still have acne when in fact you have gotten rid of the acne (or some of it) only to gain a new red bump problem. My friend told me her dermatologist suggested an oil based scrub with either salt or sugar. I was desperate so I tried it…and it worked! I swear by the stuff and have played around with different oils, salts and sugars to find the perfect combo for my skin and hopefully this blog helps you find yours! The recipe is really simple, it’s just finding the right combo that can be time consuming.

All Natural Scrub
1/2 cup oil
1 cup sugar or salt
¼ cup whatever you didn’t use in the full cup
5 – 10 drops essential oil of your choosing
½ lemon juice

Picking an Oil
This is the most important decision in this recipe. Different oils do different things. Personally I have tried almond, walnut, avocado, olive, and grapeseed oil. None of them were bad but walnut and grapeseed have been my personal favorites. You have different skin than me though so read below for your best option.

Dry Skin – Avocado, Almond, Castor, Macadamia, Olive, Apricot
Oily Skin – Grapeseed, JoJoba, Sunflower, Safflower, Rosehip
Sensitive Skin – Avocado, JoJoba
Balanced/Normal Skin – Almond, Grapeseed, Coconut, Jojoba, Rosehip, Apricot

Throughout my research on the internet the below oils have come up but there has never been enough consensus for me to confidently list them in a category. That being said, it doesn’t mean they aren’t worth trying:

Primrose
Walnut
Pomegranate
Pumpkin
Hemp
Sesame
Plum

*Notice walnut oil is on this list but it’s one of the oils I really like!

Picking a Scrubber
Salt or Sugar? You can do mostly salt with some sugar like I do, mostly sugar with some salt or all salt or all sugar. It really depends on your needs.

Salt
Salt is a harsher scrub because it’s granule edges are sharper. This may bother you if your skin is sensitive but it can also make a great exfoliant for people with dry flaky skin. Even if you opt for sugar because your face is sensitive, generally, salt is what’s recommended for the rest of your body especially your feet and hands.=

As far as choosing a salt goes. I like to use non-iodized salt mainly because iodization to salt was introduced in 1924 as a way to help with iodine deficiency in the diet. Nowadays, most people get plenty of iodine in their regular diet and I am not cooking with it so why use it?! Plus, sea salt often has trace amounts of natural iodization anyway. Furthermore, non-iodized salts sometimes contain small amounts of minerals such as calcium, magnesium, potassium, copper and iron. These help promote circulation, reduce the inflammatory response, and act as a detoxifying agent and general muscle relaxant. I kill two birds with one stone by using non-iodized sea salt. I like it fine grain to make it a little less abrasive on my skin. Bottom line, it really doesn’t matter what type of salt you use though you may want to be weary of commercial salts that could have trace amounts of aluminium in them which some have linked to alzheimer’s.

Sugar
Sugar is softer so it is better for people with sensitive skin or those who don’t know if they have sensitive skin and want to ease into the scrub life. Sugar also moisturizes more where salt does not making it great for dry skin that is also sensitive. BUT with sugar you miss out on the extra minerals.

I like to either use coconut palm sugar (the darker brown sugar) or cane juice crystals. The coconut sugar is slightly more moisturizing than the cane sugar, it also comes in a lot of variations in terms or coarseness. The smell of the coconut sugar is very strong. It smells good but it makes adding essential oils kind of pointless since I mainly do that to add a nice fragrance. Like salt, your choice in sugar doesn’t matter a ton.

Scrubber Conclusions
If you have sensitive skin and/or dry skin or simply want a soft scrub, go sugar. If you really want to exfoliate and/or have oily skin go salt.

Extras
Lemon and essential oil are not necessary but they are a nice touch. Like I said before you can “flavor” your scrub with whatever essential oil you like. Tea tree is a favorite of mine because I love the smell and tea tree oil has acne fighting components. Lemon juice also has been linked to helping fight acne.

1 Stop Pretending Sex is the Same for Men and Women

April 20, 2018
by Connie Morgan
· Culture · Thought Box

Biological differences between men and women matter. Because of biological differences men tend to be bigger and stronger. Because of biological differences women tend to be smaller and more flexible. Women tend to be more focused on people, men tend to be more focused on “things.” Men tend to like solving finite problems and women tend to like artistic challenges. This isn’t my opinion, these are facts based on evolutionary and biological research. As I’ve said many a time, men and women are different and that’s a beautiful thing.

It’s concerning that modern culture (starting in the 60s but really becoming a mainstream train of thought in the 90s) doesn’t recognize this when it comes to sex. TV shows, movies, books, blogs, magazines are all telling us that sex is exactly the same for men and women. What I mean is that promiscuity, one-night-stands and casual sex were once thought to have been something more sought after by men. Now we’re told that women should celebrate their participation in any of the above as well. Instead of teaching men that maybe they should be a little more like women when it comes to sexual activity, we teach women they should be more like men. At the same time, we’re told men are pigs! If that’s the case then why is the response for women to act more like men when it comes to sex?

In a perfect world, we would all live perfect sexually moral lives. In a perfect world, you could have the same conversation about sex with your son as you would your daughter. But it’s not a perfect world and people certainly aren’t perfect. Sex is different for men and women and there’s plenty of research to back up this statement.

Pregnancy
The most obvious difference between the sexes, is that women can become pregnant. Condoms don’t always work, hormonal birth control doesn’t always work; I know of women who have gotten pregnant while using either of these contraceptives. The only way to insure you don’t get pregnant is to not have sex. The maternal death rate in the United States is around 17 deaths per 100,000 births and pregnancy also has other life changing complications. Pregnancy takes a toll on a woman’s body and is not something to be taken lightly even when planned.

If a woman conceives she can’t keep it a secret for long like a man can because a man can’t conceive. Even if a woman decides to have an abortion, there are potential side effects, including the mother’s death in some cases. If a mother wants to give the baby up for adoption, the act of carrying a life and giving birth to a baby adds an additional emotional wrinkle that sometimes leads to a mother changing her mind after initially agreeing to an adoption. Pregnancies (especially unplanned) can lead to emotional consequences that women endure but men can avoid.

For this reason my dad’s advice to my brother and I was “don’t have sex with anyone you couldn’t do business with.” I say he told this to my brother but I actually don’t know if he did but he certainly said it to me on more than one occasion. Why me and not my brother? Because it is more relevant to me. If I get pregnant and I keep the baby, I am 1) forever connected to the baby’s father even if we are not in a relationship and 2) more locked into the responsibility than he is. From conception, the mother is literally and therefore emotionally more connected to the baby, making it harder for her to run away from the responsibility.

I do know that my father told my brother, if you get a girl pregnant, you’re pregnant too, (metaphorically) but in reality, we all know that especially in the baby’s early years, from breastfeeding to dirty diapers, the mother does much of the heavy lifting.

Injuries
Believe it or not, sex related injuries are a fairly common occurrence. Did you know 30% of women report having pain or discomfort the last time they had sex? This compared to only 5% of men. The pain could be due to a variety of factors including vaginal tearing, yeast infections and urinary tract infections. The main injury men get from sex that women don’t is a broken penis. Sounds pretty serious but it is extremely uncommon. To give you some perspective, In 13 years of analyzing medical records in a region with over 3 million people…researchers found only 42 patients with confirmed penile fractures. Yeast infections alone effect over 75% of women in their lifetime.

Forget pregnancy, sex is just more likely to cause overall discomfort for women.

Sexual Standards
While everyone who’s interacted with men and women know this, for some reason its controversial to say: men and women are different emotionally when it comes to sex. And there are countless studies to back this up.

The median number of sexual partners for a woman in America is three, while it’s five for a man. And let’s be real here, when it comes to gender, which one has an easier time finding someone willing to go to bed with them? I know very few females who couldn’t come home with a guy every Friday night if they wanted to. I know males who try to come home with a female every Friday night and fail most of the time. The standard for the average woman is higher than the standard for the average man. Most women report they do not marry the man who gave them “the best sex of their life,” but instead look for a loving, multi-dimensional relationship.

This theory has been tested in other experiments where a male and female walk around asking complete strangers if they would have sex with them. 75% of males agreed to have sex with a complete stranger where 0% of women agreed. This was the biggest gender difference ever discovered in psychological science. In a less scientific, but still fun version of this experiment, some YouTubers repeated the experiment finding less than 1% of women agreed to have sex with a stranger compared to 30% of men. Clearly, men are a little more eager to engage in casual sex than women, but why is that?

Emotional Differences
You may think women aren’t as into casual sex because of safety concerns, fear of pregnancy, or fear of being discovered but studies have also found that even when men and women are surveyed on the basis that none of the above concerns would be an issue, women are still far less interested in casual sex than men. Still think patriarchy is to blame? Researchers have found that in the most egalitarian societies the difference in the desire for promiscuity between gender actually grows larger. Furthermore, across all societies on Earth, even the least patriarchal, women always are less interested in casual sex.

Researchers have also found that men are far more interested in a two women, one man threesome versus a woman being interested in any threesome combination. Men are also more likely to have fantasies about short term sexual relationships. Men imagine having sex with more partners than women. Men spend more on prostitutes, strippers and porn..need I go on? This seems like common sense stuff to me, but I have to cover my bases.

So why do women crave longer term relationships? Why do women yearn for romance over cheap lust? Why is it that 84% of romance novel readers are women and romantic comedies are aptly nicknamed “chick flicks.” Because men and women process emotions differently.

Studies using brain imaging and blood tests have found that men are less reactionary to negative emotions because negative signals spend more time in the part of their brains associated with reasoning. A study out of Institut universitaire en santé mentale de Montréal and the University of Montreal looked at the amygdala (the brain’s threat detector) and the dorsomedial prefrontal cortex (the brain’s regulator of perception, reasoning and emotional regulation) and saw that these two areas interacted more with men when they viewed negative images compared to women.

Coauthor Stéphane Potvin, an associate professor at University of Montreal’s department of psychiatry, said in a press release:

“A stronger connection between these areas in men suggests they have a more analytical than emotional approach when dealing with negative emotions. It is possible that women tend to focus more on the feelings generated by these stimuli, while men remain somewhat ‘passive’ toward negative emotions, trying to analyze the stimuli and their impact.”

Ok, so that explains why perhaps women tend to be more feelings focused. (Not a bad thing by the way.) But why does sex make us (especially women) get all emotional? While I have my own spiritual theories, the science isn’t conclusive. But, sex does appears to have a much longer lasting emotional effect on women.

A study done by the Center for Disease Control and Prevention found that as a woman’s number of sexual partners went up before marriage, so did her likelihood of divorce. Women with over ten sexual partners are most likely to divorce while the odds of divorce are lowest amongst those women with one or zero premarital sex partners. The same is not said in regards to men, meaning marital success doesn’t seem to correlate with the number of partners the man has had before marriage. However, both men and women report more satisfaction with their sex life the fewer number of sexual partners they’ve had.

We all know intuitively that sex affects men and women differently, both physically and mentally. Why do so many pretend we have the same attitude? And if we’re choosing to push one attitude over the other why are we pushing the male attitude towards sex on women instead of the other way around?! Virtually all data shows that the fewer sexual partners you have, the more fulfilling your relationships will be.

If someone gives different advice to a female when it comes to sex as opposed to a male, don’t call them a sexist, perhaps they are simply acknowledging that sex has different consequences for men and women, which isn’t sexist at all. Perhaps they’re aware that a woman has more to lose every time she engages in sexual activity.

I’m not saying everyone must wait ‘til marriage or they’re doomed. But be picky about who you sleep with. Not only should it be a privilege for someone to go dancing in the sheets with you, it should contribute to a romantic connection you and your partner are both equally interested in pursuing and maintaining.

0 The Surprise Success of A Quiet Place

April 9, 2018
by Connie Morgan
· Culture · Thought Box

While no one predicted A Quiet Place to be a failure, in its opening weekend it surpassed expectations. Opening at number one, the movie raked in $50 million, when Hollywood predicted that optimistically it would bring just $25 million. A 97% rating on Rotten Tomatoes and word of mouth is thought to have helped boost attendance. Ryan Reynolds, Stephen King and high-profile people aplenty are singing its praises. I was one of the people helping to spread the word.

I am a big Emily Blunt fan and, like everyone else, I have watched every episode of The Office. I was excited to see the real life couple work together for the first time, and while this isn’t the first movie John Krasinski has directed, it would be the first one I watched. I spread the word because it had good reviews and I wanted to support the actors involved.

Last Friday, opening weekend, I watched the movie. If you’re unfamiliar with the premise it’s about a family, Lee (played by Krasinski), Evelyn (played by Blunt) and their children, living in a post-apocalyptic world where monsters hunt anything living, but only by sound. Make a noise and they’re on you within seconds. A review I read said to watch it in a crowded theatre (and he was right). I really liked the movie. It wasn’t terrifying like I thought it would be but was good for reasons I didn’t expect.

*Spoilers Below*
A Quiet Place has surprisingly conservative undertones. The structure of the family is traditional. By that I mean the mom is feminine and the father is masculine. The dad is the protector and the provider while the mother is the homemaker and the teacher. Very early in the film, the family loses their youngest son. They’re walking home in a line and suddenly the boy starts playing with a loud toy. Evelyn, who is closer than Lee turns around and starts crying. It’s Lee, who is farther away, who sprints as fast as he can towards his child supposedly to try to push him out-of-the-way so he can be killed by the monsters instead. Evelyn isn’t a bad parent for not running towards her child; perhaps she’s the smarter parent because there is nothing any of them can do except potentially get killed. But Lee is a man, and traditionally it’s men who run towards a fight.

Femininity is needed as well. Lee is obsessed with protecting his family and figuring out how to kill the monsters. It’s fun seeing all the clever ways they have set up their home in order to communicate, protect themselves, and survive. That being said, the man is stressed. You can’t really blame him for this but it’s Evelyn who calms him down. She pulls him away from his desk and they enjoy a tender romantic moment slow dancing while listening to music through headphones. Evelyn also calms her son down when he’s extremely nervous about going to get fish with his dad. Evelyn is the calm in the storm, even when she’s not calm. Women are generally the calming force in a family and that is certainly the case in A Quiet Place.

Speaking of bringing the son to fish, my brother and I argued about whether Lee bringing his son out to fish and leaving his daughter who wanted to go was a gender-based decision or not. I don’t think it was, but my brother does. Evelyn tells her son that Lee wants to teach him how to take care of her. At first look I would agree, this is a gender based decision. But the sister is deaf and has a history of not listening. The truth is, the daughter is a liability in more ways than one, so I see why you may not want to take her out on an excursion into monsterland. Lee does tap into his son’s masculine side later in the film when at first his son refuses to run across a field. Only when Lee tells him his mother needs his help does the boy’s attitude change, and it changes immediately.

Lee is short with the kids. He loves them but he’s all about survival while Evelyn brings warmth and meaning to the kids’ lives and her husband’s. You can tell a difference even in the way that they sign, Lee’s hands are harsh while Evelyn’s are somehow kinder. But you need both: without Lee they die, without Evelyn they want to die.

Children are sacred in this movie. Not only the born ones but the unborn. Evelyn is pregnant. You can see how in a movie all about staying as quiet as possible this could be a problem. First of all, why is she pregnant? Clearly these are smart people yet they didn’t use any condoms? They have access to condoms and in the timeframe they still wouldn’t’ve expired. This makes me think they chose to get pregnant as the bringing of new life is fundamental to their survival and humanity’s. This means they’ve decided life is still worth living and they have an obligation to contribute to the ongoing of mankind.

But maybe they got pregnant on accident. If there’s any situation in which an abortion would be ethical, it’s a world where everyone gets killed if a single sound is made. We see earlier in the movie that they have access to drugs in a nearby town. While a surgical abortion is out of the question there are certainly other ways to cause “miscarriages.” One might argue that an abortion or killing the child shortly after it’s born would be the ethical thing to do because a baby puts the whole family at risk. This seems to have never occurred to the family who set up an elaborate plan for Evelyn to give birth and take care of the baby.

Now it may seem like I’m making Evelyn’s character out to be a weak, simple woman. She isn’t. At the end of the movie she is the first and only person to actually take out one of the monsters and she does so when it’s inches away from killing all three of her children. Not only does she kill the monster, she had the calm to wait to shoot the perfect shot, knowing other monsters would be on them at the noise. The mother figure isn’t weak, just feminine, and it’s modern day feminists who conflate those two terms. The woman has a baby with no drugs while being chased by monsters. Ain’t nothing weak about that, but is there anything more feminine than giving birth? There’s nothing more important to her than protecting her children; she literally tells Lee this in the film.

Because the family operates in this traditional way, they are believable and because they are believable, you emotionally invest in them. This movie made me care about the survival of the family more than I usually do for any type of film but especially when you talk about the thriller genre.

Feminism (in its current form) is all fine and dandy in theory, but when surviving is the goal, it’s simply not sustainable and Krasinski clearly knows this based on the direction of the movie. To make a film where women are just as strong as men or men are comforting in the same way as women wouldn’t be telling the truth. A woman isn’t going to be able to race through the woods carrying a kid for as long or as fast as a man. A man isn’t going to have as much patience teaching young kids as a woman has. Of course these are generalizations, but they’re generalizations with statistical significance. To get away from that, like so many recent movies have, is to ignore the truth.

Even in a hellish world there is nothing more beautiful than life. Humans are wired to protect life under a certain dynamic. That dynamic is man and woman, mother and father, feminine and masculine. A Quiet Place hits that nail right on the head.

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